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Graphic Designer Nightmares

November 4, 2009 in NSFW, Stupid Humans

I cannot take credit for this outstanding little video on YouTube; I got the link from a friend of mine (a graphic designer by trade). For those of us who have worked in publishing or graphic design, this conversation hits very, very close to home. If you have ever dreamed of a career in publishing or graphic design, this type of behavior from clients is extremely accurate. You have been warned.

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Paul Haggis Is “Revered”? By Whom?

October 26, 2009 in Gawker, Stupid Humans

Oh tits – I’m not getting too far into this because crazy people who believe crazy things for 35 years before deciding they’re crazy scare me. Really. Just, go away. And shut up. And keep your craziness to yourself. Anyway, this WHOLE THING is crazy enough without Gawker making wild and patently unsubstantiated claims about people. I mean – how did something this blatantly untrue make it past Alan’s or Gabby’s keen editorial eye? Of course, I’m talking about Foster Kamer’s statement that Paul Haggis is “one of the most revered, successful writer-directors of the last decade”.

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ACORN Will Get You the Tax Break – But THEY Will Get You the Guns

October 9, 2009 in Stupid Humans

ACORN is the most evil and nasty thing that has ever plagued society since the Third Reich. It is awful beyond any stretch of our feeble imaginations. When you invoke the term “ACORN,” a small part of Jesus dies away, as if you have taken the very thing he set out to do away from him.

There is no salvation when it comes to ACORN, as they are helping scores of the poor and lost to find themselves, which is terribly wrong. The criminal act of helping others to avoid the Tax Man is beyond reprehensible. We should shut the bastards down— immediately. But what do we give them if there is no economic basis for their survival?

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God On The Field

October 2, 2009 in Stupid Humans

The finely screwed up balance between church and state is something that continues to plague Small Town America. It is the hottest issue since coat-hanger abortions became legalized in 1994 and marijuana prescriptions began for 5 year-old children in 1998. Now there is a different beast ruining our society — religious signs and chants during a high school football game.

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Prepare For Damnation

September 23, 2009 in Stupid Humans

Do not trust anyone with a bible in their hand posing for a photo. It is essential that you heed these words. When you have people like Bill Keller in the world, this point is only made more concretely.

To jest, the man’s radio show has become something of a “Holier Then Thou” freak show. Not to say it wasn’t before— it was— but now the man has gone over the edge. He may actually believe what he’s saying. Is it possible?

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Blasphemers Inc.

August 28, 2009 in Stupid Humans

TEH RAPTUREIf  you are on this site chances are that you are a sinner and will not be joining Jesus in The Rapture.   Even if you are not a sinner there is a good chance that you are a member of one or more of the many groups that will be left behind (e.g.  Atheists, Jews, Gays, etc.).

However, we can still play an important role in this exciting event. The question is, how?

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Twatty Brits Get Trippy Over Twitter

July 27, 2009 in Politics, Stupid Humans

YES I JUST WROTE A HEADLINE THAT HURTS MY OWN EYES. That well-known comedy collective “The UK Government” has embraced the times, not to mention the latest web technology-that-still-mystifies-me-as-to-why-it-actually-exists, by issuing guidelines for using “Twitter”, a micro-blogging service popular with the lonely, needy and insane. Read the rest of this entry →

Am I Evil For Laughing At This Until It Hurts?

June 17, 2009 in Funny!, Future Of Journalism, Stupid Humans

I love a good prank. I’m still laughing at the one I pulled off a couple of days ago, when I hacked into Ayatollah Ali Khamenei’s Twitter account (#supremleader) and started writing stuff like “electn reslts so bogus dudez. will totes go 4 rcount mabes. cant w8 4 twilight2!!!1!” and then AP picked up on it, interviewed me by Yahoo! Messenger and I was like “noes, AP – iz real aytolla frm Irn and i thinkz amadadadajahd iz lame and lettrman iz teh innocentz!! ;-) “.

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But Will Someone Protect Me From New York Crazies?

June 17, 2009 in Stupid Humans

If, sometime in the future I manage to get off my stupid antidepressants and actually communicate with other humans and generally get myself in fucking gear, I’d like to visit the city of New York in America. I’ve heard a lot about it, and would love to see all the famous sights such as The Statue Of Lincoln holding an ice-cream and eat one of your “hot” dogs in the street at gunpoint with a “crack ho” screaming at my elbows for no reason at all.

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