Moron Who Wasn’t Running For President Isn’t Running For President
October 5, 2011 in Breaking News
Like sticking an electric toothbrush up your nostril, this may come as a shock to you – Sarah Palin will not be running for President of the United States. I know, I know, I know – there’s some people out there who can’t believe this news, especially the morons who gave her money, but fuck them – they’re morons and we live in a Darwinian world (unlike those particular morons). What now for Sarah Palin, you ask? Well – I’ll answer – a short burst of interest in the news for a day or so, then soon enough – divorce, scandal, drug allegations, family-feuding on a Borgiasesque level across all forms of media, soft-core center-spread in Playboy, a tell-all memoir then probably a violent, angry death at the hands (paws) of an actual female grizzly bear.
It’s the Circle of Modern American Life. The End.
Yesterday a woman married a man in a marriage ceremony. The parents of the bride and groom said they were very happy with the wedding. Several people witnessed the marriage, and celebrities included that guy who was in that show set in a bar who is already married to that woman in that time-travel movie, the one with the cowboys.
America was gripped today as reports began filtering in about a golfer who crashed his car into a tree. Both the tree, car and golfer sustained slight damage in the accident, though none of it was deemed serious.
I just posted the rant below at that other site in response to the news that mass killer Nidah Hasan was yelling “Allahu Akbar” (God is great) while shooting up the Fort Hood army base yesterday. It strikes me that we’re at a really strange place in our history if we need to go looking for reasons to be divided over a tragedy like this. Apparently, the right is feeling triumphal or something. I don’t get it. 
