June 30, 2012 in Fashion, Food And Drink, The Officer's Monologue – A Guide to Fashion
“The Officer’s Monologue” is one male police officer’s continuous narrative about fashion, interior design, decor, dining, and all things esthetic. All remarks are approximate quotes of actual statements made to the author—usually over sandwiches and cookies. Any resemblance between the principal character to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
A buddy of mine from the military came in from out of town, so he called me to see if I wanted to hook up. So I’m like, “what the fuck?” and tell him to meet me at YOLO because I’ve been wanting to check it out. Read the rest of this entry →
June 26, 2012 in Dating, Fameballs, Recaps
UPDATE: I am now engaged in a Twitter tête-à-tête with Julia Allison. See? I told you she misses us. Read the rest of this entry →
June 26, 2012 in Food And Drink
Fine dining is an almost blessed event. The ambiance, the richness of the flavor, the inevitable sticker shock for two scoops of ice cream or a cup of coffee – when done correctly, all the elements blend together to create an unforgettable experience of satiety. When done incorrectly, it is a painful lesson in economics and indigestion.
“Would you like to hear the specials?”
The dance begins. Read the rest of this entry →
June 26, 2012 in 20 Things About Me, Personal, Rants, Wordsmoker
1.) I have been recruiting an army of (Hot) Non Profit workers. We like to go skinny dipping and talk about the unstoppable turquoise sexuality.
2.) I’ve started going to a cruisy gym for low income humans. The thought of remembering really sort of sickens me at this point, in long term memory, and muscle memory alike; I like to do my cruisy workout with my eyes closed. It is nice and refreshing to discover the value of bodies all over again (especially if you were a dumbfuck, like me, last time you were in shape).
Hurray for introverts. Read the rest of this entry →
June 26, 2012 in Wordsmoker Poetry
June 25, 2012 in Book Fuck Club
Parents should be advised to not let their children read this book–it could be hazardous to their future. See, it’s hard to read a regular book after reading “The Shadow God” because the book is so terrible that any other book will seem good by comparison. Say your son or daughter reads “Shadow God” and then reads “Mein Kampf”–MEIN KAMPF will seem like a good book! I’ve already contacted the Parents Literary Resource Center (PLRC) and the Family Fitness Society to let them know that this book is the literary equivalent of a gateway drug to moral confusion. If still aren’t convinced, consider this: what if Pauley Shore dictated a book to Nancy Grace and it was proofread by Saddam Hussein. That’s this book. Seriously.
This is a review of a horror novel called The Shadow God from Amazon.com user Len Snark. It’s reviews like this that bring books like The Shadow God to the Book Fuck Club’s attention. And since Book Fuck Club is all about honoring the worst books ever written, we have chosen it as our next selection.
Get your copy for only $3.79 and tune in on Monday, July 23rd to discuss this novel with us.
June 22, 2012 in Book Fuck Club
Alright, it’s time to get serious. Moon People was fun, and we had an okay turnout, but it’s time to pick our next book. Something that even elite literati like MilitantRubberDucky can stoop to reading. There have been a few suggestions so far, so let’s look at what we have and vote. You can also bring up something new if you like. Just tell me two books you would consider reading for Book Fuck Club. Here’s a list of what has been suggested so far and some other suggestions. Read the rest of this entry →
June 22, 2012 in Technology
ROBOT BOUDOIR PHOTOGRAPHER FOR HIRE
IS YOUR ROBOT SPECIAL, BUT YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS IT? I’M A SERIOUS SEMI-PROFESSIONAL PHOTOGRAPHER WHO WILL BRING OUT YOUR ROBOT’S INNER HOTNESS!
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