Moron Who Wasn’t Running For President Isn’t Running For President
October 5, 2011 in Breaking News
Like sticking an electric toothbrush up your nostril, this may come as a shock to you – Sarah Palin will not be running for President of the United States. I know, I know, I know – there’s some people out there who can’t believe this news, especially the morons who gave her money, but fuck them – they’re morons and we live in a Darwinian world (unlike those particular morons). What now for Sarah Palin, you ask? Well – I’ll answer – a short burst of interest in the news for a day or so, then soon enough – divorce, scandal, drug allegations, family-feuding on a Borgiasesque level across all forms of media, soft-core center-spread in Playboy, a tell-all memoir then probably a violent, angry death at the hands (paws) of an actual female grizzly bear.
It’s the Circle of Modern American Life. The End.