Wordsmoker

In an attempt for me to get some exercise and have an excuse to drink beer, I have signed up for a summer adult kickball league. That’s “adult” as in no spawn allowed—not like the “adult” where everyone runs around in ass-less chaps and nipple clamps (to my never-ending disappoint). Our first game is coming up, and we are missing a vital piece of information: a team name. We need one for when we’re booed off the field to engrave on our trophies, and so that the groupies know which team they’re supposed to be helping “get in the zone.”  I have been reading the few names suggestions provided so far, and let me tell you it is grim, folks. I know that I’m probably not dealing with rocket scientists, but still, I’m pretty sure mythical typing monkeys could put out a better product.

Take a look at the shit being put out:

• Here for Beer
• Sofa King Good
• Crab Cakes and Kickball
• I’d Hit That

Obviously, these are all shameful and I can’t possibly perform well under such awful names, so I am challenging you to come up with a team name that will rock their little knee socks off. We play Fridays and go to a local bar after to drink to our wins/losses lesser wins. Oh and our jerseys are blue. Not a lot to go on, but I know your collective brilliance will pull through with fantastical names that I will then pawn off as my own. Kickballers everywhere are counting on you—failure is not an option.