Wordsmoker

A recently publicized study by the Pew Research Center’s Forum on Religion & Public Life indicated that atheists are generally more knowledgeable about religion than religionists. When the story was first reported, atheists celebrated, the faithful cried foul, and Madonna rode on a unicorn up to heaven.

Since Wordsmoker readers are better educated and less affluent than the average American adult, the results of the Pew poll don’t accurately reflect the knowledge of its readership. I have therefore decided to perform my own religious knowledge study. I hope you’ll volunteer and submit your answers below in the comment section. By just setting aside a few minutes to answer these questions you will be helping the lives of thousands of orphans.

Once the answers are in and I’ve had sufficient time to analyze the data I will post the results below broken down by the age, religious affiliation, and sex fetish proclivities of the test takers. Some categories will include Evangelical Protestants, Hot Gay Mormons, Castrati, Pagan Nudists, and New York – Jewish – Left-Wing – Liberal - Intellectual - Central Park West - Brandeis University - Socialist Summer Camps and  Father With the Ben Shahn Drawings.

1. How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? And also, which one is paying for it?

2. Three monks are thrown into a fire defending their beliefs; do you order the salad or french fries as your side?

3. What’s the main reason why you’re going to hell?

4. Who on Noah’s Ark cleaned up at Blackjack?

5. Which biblical figure appeared in an LA courthouse to face DUI charges with “F U” drawn on her fingernail?

6. What would have happened if Eve decided that she wanted to be a career woman?

7. The Talmud relates that one of Haman’s complaints to King Ahasuerus about the Jews is that they have too many holidays. Name one Jew who hasn’t made that complaint on their own.

8. Why did someone once approach me at a Copy Max and tell me that I will spend eternity in Hell for not being baptized right after I let him cut in front of me on line because he only had one copy to make? I let him go first; where’s the decency?

9. It was recently discovered that Adolf Hitler had some Jewish blood. Since Barack Obama has zero Jewish blood does that mean he’s even more of a Hitler than Hitler?

10. Which Spanish Inquisition torture tools can be confused for sex toys?

You may also add more questions for use in a future survey should I scrap this one if the results aren’t to my liking.

Thank you for your participation.