by Chillbear Latrigue
September 20, 2009 in 5 Second Movie Review
Tedious, yellow and way too much talk about corn.
Tags: chillbear put on 45 pounds to write this review, the informant
I find the fake Saul Bass poster offensive…
But was it funny?
@BJon: It had it’s moments, but I feel that the ads were a bit misleading. It is based on a true story, which I didn’t know walking into the theater. Consequently, the writers may have been constrained by the facts. However, Damon was great in it. I would recommend at least waiting until the DVD release.
@ChillbearLatrigue: Since when have Hollywood writers ever been constrained by facts?
The ads make Damon look the most appealing he’s ever looked to me in years (I’m not really a Bourne-type person).
How was Joel McHale? I lurrve him.
It makes me sad that this wasn’t 100% awesome, especially since my husband and I have an impossible time agreeing on movies (which means we never end up going to any) and we actually both want to see this one. I find comedic Matt Damon hilarious though, so I’m thrilled to hear that he doesn’t disappoint.
@DahlE: God knows, I love Chillbear as much as the next Wordsmoker lady, but in this case, I think you and Mr. Lama should go on and see the movie. I say this because Chillbear could accidentally cause marital strife by stifling your desire to see a movie you already agreed to see with Mr. Lama, thus resulting in your eventual move to South Florida to live with Chillbear as in “If some g.d. nut on the Internet is so smart about movies, why don’t you go live with him!”
Mama P: There’s no two ways about it, sooner or later you’re gonna have to start a relationship advice column here. I can tell it’s in your blood.
@Kneetoe: YES. YES. YES. “Love talk with Mama P,” or some reasonable facsimile thereof. A million times yes.
@Kneetoe & DahlE: Oh, you kids. Flattery will get you everywhere with me. This would be so fun!
@Knee: Or she could start a “Destroy Other People’s Master Plans” column, wherein she exposes some villainous plot to wrest the affections of various Wordsmoker women from their husbands.
@MamaP: Way to go. Remind me never to plan an assassination around you.
@Dahl: I suppose there’s no reason for me to pretend to only eat kosher at this point, is there?
@Chillbear: Drop the pound of bacon and move away from Mrs. Lama!
@Chill: Yes, a matchmaking game where Mama P gets to say who goes with whom. Actually, my mother-in-law does this same thing over dinner, matching a single man with, say, a woman from a married couple, or splitting up two married couples to match the two wives. I always marvel at her creativity and, often as not, her genius.
@Chillbear: As if I – a lonely lady, all alone – could possibly thwart the cool vibes and sexual charisma of Wordsmoker’s resident Casanova. When we’re not throwing themselves at Virus, we’re marking up out notebooks with big fat “I (heart) Chillbears.’
I hate my life.
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@Kneetoe: Tell your MIL to come sit next to me. I do so love evil genius! (You can sit on my other side.)
THIS IS BECOMING DISTURBING.
What? You don’t want to see pictures of my family?????
BL: My MIL’s the best; I give her shit about her matchmaking ways on a regular basis, but she does bring evil genius to it.
I have posted pictures of my darling cat and beautiful daughter and you fuckheads have said NADA!
Your cat looks like a mini-tiger (I likey) and your daughter is adorable. and obviously comes from a line of sass.
Seriously though, Mama, your cat is really cute and your daughter is frickin adorable.
MamaP has posted pictures of a polar bear that is supposed to be me and you fuckheads have said NADA! Thank you MamaP.
Your daughter scares me with her attitude.
Chill: All I can say is that you’re surprisingly adorable.
@MamaP: Your daughter is absolutely, positively adorable. I was just hesitant to say so, what with me being on parole and all. I knew you’d understand.
Strangely, I don’t feel at all pathetic after brow-beating people to compliment me. That said, thanks guys!!!
@SFBirdie: I think Toby (cat) has kind of a large snout.
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