The Wisdom Of Tim’rous Beasties
August 31, 2009 in A Birthday With Shoes
There’s really no reason Virus and I should be such good internet pals.
After all, I don’t speak Old Norse COBOL Belgian, and Virus’ practice of urinating into his bagpipes is, well, frankly not the way I was raised to deal with the frustration of repeatedly mispronouncing “Massachusetts” through an inexpertly-masticated bolus of shortbread haggis thistles. Ordinarily, he would hate me because of my freedom, and I would hate him because of his Sheena Easton. We’d be the original odd couple!
But like many people from such different backgrounds, Virus and I are friends largely through our cats. It’s true. My Lydia and Virus’ Jake, Henry and Ben have been trading emails (along with a good bit of yarn porn) since long before Virus and I found common ground making Laurel Touby jokes over on that other blog. For instance, here’s one of their recent exchanges:
To: Misslydia@freedomfries.com
Date: 2009-08-22, 12:01PM EDT
Wee lassie,
Check out these braw pics o’ the human’s gret white catbox. Ye wouldna believe how loud it is, and there’s muckle watter in there!
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Reply to: Jakewithshoes@kiltnet.com
Date: 2009-08-22, 12:15PM EDT
Thx 4 the pics!!! 
Ur human is weird.
See?
So anyway, my friend, on this auspicious day of your birth, I want to say have a happy one. Lift a few pints down at what I believe you call a “bog,” kick up your kilt, and give your tam o’shanter a good toss! I’m so glad to know you.
P.S. Lydia told me to tell you “chirrup meow,” which roughly translates to “seanconnerynessiescones,” or Belgian for Happy Birthday.
