My Campaign To Promote The Early Death Of Jay Leno May Soon Be Illegal

May 5, 2009 in Legal, Politics

In a blow to my nascent campaign to arrange the possibly televised murder of Jay Leno, a U.S. House of Representatives bill proposed by Rep. Linda T. Sanchez (D-Calif.) (and I think about 14 other internet buzzkillers) could soon make it illegal for Wordsmoker or any other web media outlet thing “”To Cause Substantial Emotional Distress Through “Severe, Repeated, and Hostile” Speech.”

Fuck.

I quote from the bill:

“Whoever transmits in interstate or foreign commerce any communication, with the intent to coerce, intimidate, harass, or cause substantial emotional distress to a person, using electronic means to support severe, repeated, and hostile behavior, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than two years, or both….

["Communication"] means the electronic transmission, between or among points specified by the user, of information of the user’s choosing, without change in the form or content of the information as sent and received; …

["Electronic means"] means any equipment dependent on electrical power to access an information service, including email, instant messaging, blogs, websites, telephones, and text messages.”

Of course, not only could this bill – if passed – ensure the longevity of Mr. Leno’s “career” – but it also seems to me to be a direct attack on the First Amendment, even from my non-legal, non-American viewpoint.

Anyway – if you want, you can coerce, intimidate, harass and cause substantial emotional distress to Representitive Sanchez by contacting her via here.

More about this here.

Image via hell itself

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/senorwences/ Senor Wences

    I was one click away from starting a Facebook group to promote punching Ira Glass in the gut, then their little threat line about deleting my whole profile over that sort of thing made me think twice.

    But Ira Glass does need to be socked in the gut, every hour on the hour, on air.

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/samuraipandapoetry/ samuraipandapoetry

    So, if i were to send Representative Sanchez the same photo I sent Glen Beck, I could be sent to jail?

    Worth it.

    In reference to Florida, though, if you don’t wish to be harassed via electronic communication, you need not purchase devices for electronic communication.

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/fictionsinmotion/ Vaquero

    Wency: You don’t like coconut and now you say you don’t like Ira Glass? Will you please make a list of 20 things you don’t like & post it so I can decide if I really like you or not? Because this is snowballing here (and I mean the real snow that rolls and collects more snow as it rolls).

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/helmangiraffe/ helmangiraffe

    Wences: you are breaking my heart with the Ira Glass hate.

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/senorwences/ Senor Wences

    Yeah, I seem to displease a lot of good folks when I call Ira Glass out as a fool. Plus my general abhorrence for NPR, in general (“Coming up next, the life of a restaurant chair. I’m Corey Flintoff.”). Oh, and Sarah Vowell? Bee-yorch.

    I also think New York pizza is shitty, Little Miss Sunshine was a piece of crap, and believe flamenco dancing is stupid.

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/unfun/ Unfun

    Wences hates everything. Last night he tried to convince me that every Yankee has shrunken balls, and none of them can fuck. My desire to schtupp Jeter remains unflagging.

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/senorwences/ Senor Wences

    Everybody else who doesn’t believe every single professional ballplayer on the planet has shriveled bits is welcome to chime in.

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/senorwences/ Senor Wences

    And admit it, Unfun, flamenco dancing is VERY stupid.

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/unfun/ Unfun

    Um, I spent much time in Sevilla, and I fucking love everything Andaluz, including flamenco. THank you very much. How can you not love something so passionate, beautiful, and Spanish? God damn you!

  • http://wordsmoker.com/help/members-3/senorwences/ Senor Wences

    Flamenco dancing is retarded and you know it.