Wordsmoker

Welcome to the latest edition of Celebrity Shame, where we round up the latest gossip floating around the web which others copied from other blogs rounding up the latest gossip to come out of celebrity blogs read in on-set trailers by bored personal assistants talking to each other in chat-rooms about celebrities which certain frequently copied gossip blogs recently highlighted on E! and other celebrity gossip blogs on the web I have no soul left celebrity gossip please shoot blog me for making me cover this celebrity no kill me I gossip mean it on a blog about the hottest celebrity gossip!

A slightly later than planned Celebrity Shame today, as I’ve mostly been crying and trying to fit my head inside the microwave and turn it on to “High” with my right foot.

Anyway, the medics came after my upstairs neighbor, Carlos, started complaining about my high-pitched screaming at a copy of US Weekly, and they gave me something to calm me down and it worked then Carlos’ hair started to shoot light into my eyes, beautiful hairlight from Carlos here’s your daily dose of Celebrity Gossip….

1. He’s Got Rhythm But No Son: Which ex-drummer from a mega 90′s rock group recently ran over his own son with a lawnmower after he’d taken MAN CARLOS’ HAIR IS ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL a handful of prescription drugs in keeps in his “Happy Bucket” beside his bed? Neighbors were shocked to see the boy being chased down the freeway by a wild-haired man astride A GOLDEN SWAN I THINK OR SOMETHING MAGICAL LIKE THAT I WISH I’D SEEN THAT WOW

2. Catch Me If You Can: Which hot-bodied actress is so into her fitness regime that both screenwriters and directors have to follow her in a van with the doors open, yelling questions about character development because she simply refuses to stop running, even on set? Three grips have been ran over this week alone, and a hairstylist has ended up with slight CARLOS COME OVER HERE TURN AROUND MAN WOW bruising to her feet and hands as she tried to get out of the way of the VAN OF MADNESS STOP THE VAN OF MADNESS CARLOS IT WILL EAT YOUR FACE

3. Stop! Begging Time!: Which fading rap-star, a one-hit wonder in the 90′s, has now been witnessed begging for loose change in the atruim of CAA? His trademark baggy-pants and bulging, terrifying eyes are now tattered and worn NO NO NO CARLOS DON’T GO MAN COME BACK AND STAY WITH ME WHILE I TYPE THIS SHIT IF YOU DON’T STAY THEY MIGHT HEAR MY KEYBOARD RATTLE AND COME BACK CARLOS DON’T GO COOL MAN STAY A WHILE WITH ME HAVE A DRINK OF WATER FROM THE TAP IT’S BRILLIANT JUST TURN THAT THING AND THE WATER COMES OUT AND IT’S FULL OF LEMONS FROM THE SUN THE BEAUTIFUL SUN THE ONE IN THE SKY YOU KNOW NOT THE UNDERSUN THATS WHAT THE MOON IS CALLED IN ZANZIBAR OR SOME PLACE FROM LORD OF THE RINGS CARLOS

Leave your answers in the comments as usual, Carlos.